Last week we decided to move Frida’s toddler bed into our bedroom (for now the “family bedroom” I guess?!).

Her bed had previously been in her room, but as we are still cosleeping it wasn’t being used at all. The few times I had tried to get her to nap in her room, it took ages and was just not very successful – and who can blame her? Most of her toys are in that room, and her only association with it is play, not sleep. Moving all of her toys out wasn’t an option (we don’t have a playroom and our house isn’t very big), but more and more I felt that if she was going to sleep out of our bed, moving her into her room with our current set up was not going to work.

It also seemed like a big jump to move her into another room. Lying next to me, she reliably sleeps most of the way through the night, perhaps waking once or twice. All I have to do is lie her back down and cuddle her and she immediately goes back to sleep. The logistics of this seemed much harder if she was in a room behind two closed doors (we can’t leave bedroom doors open as our cat likes to jump on our faces). I know that it’s unusual in our society to bed / room share with a toddler or older child, but for us, for now, it makes sense. It also means that she has a playroom with lots of space to play.

As for Frida actually sleeping in her own bed? Well, this week was in hindsight not the best week to try as she’s been ill so we have been happy for her to be in our bed. She’s had a few naps in her own bed though, and has done a few stretches from the beginning of the night until around 1am when she’s woken up and I’ve just brought her in with me rather than resettling her in her bed. Now she’s feeling better we’re going to try again, this time resettling her in her own bed if needed.

When it’s time for Frida to move into her own bedroom (and I have no expectations about when that might be!) I think we will move her into the tiny bedroom (currently used as room for her books and as a guest room) so that she still has a dedicated play space separate from where she sleeps and her sleeping space is calm and peaceful. However, our home layout is always evolving, so we will see.

Although Frida’s sleep is hugely improved since I night-weaned her a few months ago, she currently wakes around 5:30am asking to nurse, which is still a bit too early for me. I usually ask her to wait until 6 which can lead to frustration for her. I’m considering getting a Gro Clock as an easy way for her to tell the difference between night and day, especially as the days get longer, but the blue light puts me off, so I’m not sure really. Maybe I just need to accept that earlier mornings are the trade-off for better sleep at night.

I will do another post soon showing you around her playroom soon. She’s really enjoying the space so far.

Posted by:Eloise R

2 replies on “Sleep, and the family bedroom 

  1. We have our daughter’s toddler bed in our (family) bedroom too. Actually we have three beds – ours, her cot set up as a co-sleeper and the toddler bed! She chooses either her “big girl bed” or “baby bed” at bedtime. I must admit I prefer when she sleeps next to me in the cot because she usually sleeps through (although we do have a 5am nursing habit too). When she starts off in the toddler bed, she always ends up coming into the cot next to me around midnight. No plans for moving her to her own room anytime soon – I love having her sleep close by!

  2. Eloise! I started following you a couple months ago. My daughter, too, is named Frida (named after her great-grandmother Elfride) I aspire to utilize a lot of your parenting techniques and create a montessori -esque environment! She almost 19 months. We are bed sharing and she still nurses at night, during the day, basically all the time! Wanting to night wean and hope you can shed some tips/insight. I have tried several times to coax her back to sleep without nursing and it turns into a 3 hour crying ordeal. Not ideal! We are also bed sharing but hoping to get her into her own bed/floor mattress in our room soon. Do you have recommendations for a mattress? Just wanted to say hello!

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